SERIOUSLY INJURED DURING ROUTINE THROTTLING OF WORTHLESS AMERICANS
for the band 'Beret!' ushered in the new year a la Francais with
an especially gruesome beating of random, hapless Americans. While
this is nothing new for the seasoned vet, things turned sour when
Fausse-Couche attempted a very rare Savate technique to disembowel
one American with his left foot and his leg became stuck among
the thick intestines of the victim. He sustained a tear to critical
tendons in his knee and underwent reluctant surgery at the hands
of American medical 'professionals'. Due to the lengthy recovery
period, Beret! has been forced to reschedule part of their upcoming
tour. Currently, the dates are being rescheduled and Beret! will
be back on the road as soon as Albert stops whining.
There has been
speculation among certain groups that this is in fact a cleverly
guised act of sabotage by the notorious militant patriots, L.O.G.G.G.,
or the Legion Of God Given Glory. This infamous underground group
of crazed mongrels and Bush supporters has been behind such international
scandals as Homeland Security and New Coke, and has long set their
sites on destroying Beret! along with every other group they see
as a threat to what they call 'a damn fine way of life for any
red meat-eating American with a set of grapes.' It was said that
possibly one of the doctors attending the wounded Fausse-Couche
was in fact a L.O.G.G.G. spy there to corrupt the surgery and
cause this extended convelescence.
cause, Beret! has been temporarily delayed on their trek across
the country, and just as the long awaited 'Fromage de la Rue'
is being released late January. For more on this story and the
continuing L.O.G.G.G. investigation, as well as the new tour dates,
check back soon at AngryFrenchmen.com, and for more on the upcoming
album release, click right here!